Being Mary Jane, Olivia Pope, Love & Hip Hop, Real Housewives and Maya Angelou

Heeeeyyyyyyyyyy "brownistas!"

I know. I know. It's been FOREVER!

photo courtesy of

I can honestly say that I missed you, and I found out that you missed me too!

SOOOOOOO much has happened! I don't know where to start! Ok. Let's start with the most important. I FINALLY GRADUATED FROM SEMINARY!

Praise God from whom ALL blessings flow! It was the LONGEST 7 years of my life. This was my second Master's and to say that it kicked my tail would be an understatement! I went into the program single. Along the way, I picked up my wonderful husband, and these three little people who live in our house for free and keep calling me "mommy." (don't know why they think I am here to take care of them... the whole thing is just weird. Wait. I'm just joking. My sister works for Social Services. I don't need a knock on the door following this post.)

Needless to say, it was a true struggle at times trying to balance it all. There were so many times when I wanted to give up.

Ya'll don't hear me.

I was over it.

Look, I graduated from high school, college and already had a Master's. There were so many times when I just wanted to throw my hands up and walk away. Only thing stopping me was not wanting to pay good ole' Sallie Mae back for a degree that I didn't earn. That is the true definition of "not hot."

Seriously, I could not have completed this without God.

Revelation: I can't do life without God.

As I look back over the years, I handled a lot. (Of course I didn't do it by myself but this is MY blog and I already gave my "thank you" speeches to everyone who contributed! Sheesh!) ANYWHO!

I didn't really know I had so many people watching me, but apparently when I walked across the stage, a whirlwind of emotion took over a lot of people close to me. Everyone just started running down the list of things I was doing, had done, and accomplished. I had to stand back, try to focus and realize they were talking about me! This was a little difficult to do seeing as though I had to decipher what they were saying through sobbing tears.

PAUSE FOR A MOMENT: Do you know how AWESOME you are? Sometimes, you have to have a conversation with someone on the outside to get a good scoop on you. The problem with so many of us is that we are "used to" ourselves. We have become common in our eyes and fail to see our power, potential and progress. It would do you some good to hear about yourself from a trusted source. I'm trying to tell you that you are pretty amazing!

Ok, and we're back from the commercial break.

There was so much in those 7 years. I guess if I had to sum up my journey, the last 7 years was about me truly deciding and walking in the kind of woman I was going to be. According to some biblical scholars, the number 7 represents completion.

How fitting is that?

7 years and I finally settled on what Eboni Akia Blair is going to represent and accomplish in this life.

1. Eboni Blair is going to be woman of God who fulfills her purpose as a messenger of the Gospel and a disciple maker.

2. Eboni Blair is going to be the kind of wife her husband needs.

3. Eboni Blair is going to be the kind of mother her children need.

4. Eboni Blair is going to be a professional, a business woman, an artist and most of all a servant.

5. Eboni Blair will be a woman of her word filled with humility and integrity.

6. Eboni Blair will live an unlimited life and allow God to use her however He sees fit.

7. Eboni Blair will leave a legacy, a proud one, that will impact generations to come.

That's it. That's my mission statement, vision outline, whatever you want to call it.

With the recent death of Maya Angelou, I really began to reflect. She left behind a powerful legacy.

Often we as women quote her renowned poem, "Phenomenal Woman" waving our womanhood banner proudly as we tell the world to hear us roar because we run it on our independent tip.

That's interesting.

I wonder if we, as women today, can really claim the words in that inspiring literary work. Dr. Angelou wrote some riveting words filled with substance. Language that cries out everything buried deep within passion, life, soul, know, the stuff that legendary women are made of.

In a day where we as women have so many choices before us as to what we want to reflect and represent, I am a little fearful of what we are admiring and choosing to adopt as our own identity. Don't worry, I am not going to bash anyone for watching "Scandal," "Being Mary Jane," or any of the Love and Hip-Hops or Real Housewives "reality" (it's not real, ya'll) series. I don't particularly watch them all, and when I do, I am not overtaken by the foolery and debauchery that we have labeled as "entertainment."

I am somewhat thrown off by us taking on these stories as our own, believing that what is portrayed is "real," and replacing our standards with these (fill in the blank because I am at a loss for words) standards. We tell ourselves we can watch religiously without being influenced. Well, I will leave that up to the experts to argue. My point is not to persuade you to change your television viewing schedule. No, beloved, a deeper issue has my attention.

I want you to really ask yourself, "what kind of woman am I called to be?" Dr. Angelou had an assignment that she spent her life fulfilling. Can you and I say the same?

Ahhh, there is so much I want to say to my generation of women!

I want you to examine everything, and I want you to seek God. Ask Him, with all sincerity, what He had in His wonderful mind when He determined the world could not function without your existence for such a time as this. When you have your answer, I want you to embrace it so much so that it pulsates through your blood, flows from your fingertips, leaks from your lips, and creates a fragrance so potent from your pores that it permeates the room long after your presence has departed.

There is a call for us to be more than quotes we repeat with no conviction to live them, Facebook statuses, Instagram pictures, 140 characters worth of empty wisdom on Twitter, cliches, and shadows. We're living in a day where we are believing our own self promotion. (Social networking is making that easy to do.) We are losing substance, the nature of true accomplishments, and the ability to know and establish the right priorities in the process.

You are an amazing creation.

It's simply mind blowing what you can do, and your ability is not even fully maximized.

I have done a lot in these last 7 years, but I can promise you that the next 7 are going to be nothing short of extraordinary.

So, I leave you with this--put your eyebrows on...we have work to do.

Until next time, "brownistas..."

Eboni Blair 
Wife, Mom, Artist, Speaker/Servant, Blogger, Author & more! 

Eboni Blair offers a refreshing take on the everyday woman and the permission to not lose yourself while being everything to everyone!



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