Understand what your WINNING looks like!
- Eboni Blair
- Sep 1, 2012
- 4 min read
What's going down "brow"nistas?! (I think this will be my opening greeting from now on...)
So, I am excited. I have decided we are going to start a movement! Are you in?
First thing we are going to do is drive our fellow "brow"nista sista girls to this blog! Then I am working on some surprises for my faithful followers that you are NOT going to want to miss!
Now, a wise woman once taught me "when you are about to make a major move, tell NO ONE!" So, for right now, the big things that are about to happen as a result of this blog is "on the hush," but TRUST me, you ALL will benefit because this is for all the dynamic women, wives and moms out there who sacrifice day in and day out! So, I am going to spend my time LOVING YOU! (I am SO excited...just wait and see. I can see it as I am sitting here typing...whew...GOD!)
Now, on to the topic of the day. Did you know you are WINNING? (Thanks, Charlie Sheen)
Yes, you are!
I used to struggle feeling like I was less of a woman because I wasn't as glamorous as I used to be having traded in my designer blouse for an "Old Navy" comfortable v-kneck t-shirt that would accommodate for spit up (no diss to Old Navy). I used to feel like my life wasn't as special because I wasn't gracing the cover of some woman's magazine or on television flaunting a high-end lifestyle. I used to feel like I was lame, or something, because I wasn't being featured in the social highlight pictures of elite functions. I really felt like everyone was leading a far more exciting life than me.
I was blinded.
I had "belittled" my life making it routine, mundane, tedious, and with little meaning. To me, I was a "mom" and a "wife." I was the washed out chick in the back of the photo who no one noticed. I was the "use to be" and the "yeah, she looks familiar but what's her name again?"
Have you ever felt like that?
Well, let me tell you something...

You are TRIPPIN'! (and so was I!)
Let me digress...
So, I was watching an episode of weTV's "Mary Mary" where Tina (one of the Mary's) finds out she is pregnant with her soon to be 5th child. It was an emotional episode because she really did not want to have anymore children. Naturally, there were some people who criticized her for her feelings. I, however, understood the root of her struggle and therefore sympathized with her for a moment. See, Tina understood what having another child would mean for her. Like you and I, she was no slouch when it came to being a wife and mom. She gave, or at least tried to give, her best to her family. At times she was stressed, feeling like she was disappointing everyone, and simply stretched trying to figure out how to balance it all. Adding another person to the mix, who was going to need and demand more of her, just overwhelmed the poor woman! She understood that her response to that 5th child was going to be the same 100% she tried to give everyone else. Her "fear" was not out of her being selfish but the opposite. She was overwhelmed because she was going to be more than a "bare minumum" wife and mom and she understood that meant exerting more effort and strength! She felt tapped out!
No one stresses about something for which they are not going to give any effort. In Tina's mind, it was "how am I going to give this kid the best, the same way I desire to give my entire family, without passing out in the struggle?!" JESUS, TAKE THE WHEEL!
This, my dear "brow"nistas, was a good depiction of where we all find ourselves every now then and again, as women, wives, and moms. I always say and lean on "our [Godly women] love is in the details."
Now, let me tie together the two points.
You have to understand your life, at times, is a struggle because you desire to be exemplary at being there for your family. You take the back seat because it's best for the team. Honey, that makes you a STAR! You are more fierce than ANYTHING walking the red carpet because you are pouring into something greater than yourself. When we are long gone, our legacies will live on in our families. The sacrifice we make is far greater than any accomplishment we acheive at the expense of our families.
Besides, here is the great news...
You can be a loving wife, fabulous mom AND do some pretty awesome stuff ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Ain't God grand?!
Our life is NOT lacking at all. We are rich beyond our wildest dreams because we have spouses and children who want to "do life" with us and that is priceless!
True, there is alot you can have if you are willing to compromise. My God given purpose is to show women everywhere that you don't have to and nor should you! Our families need us and we can still do great things without neglecting our husbands and kids. God has made us to be dynamic and He gives us the grace and anointing to fulfill all of our roles and acheive our dreams! It is more than a possibility for us, it is a reality!
I want to encourage you to tap into your passions. Fill your "brow"time with something that excites you. Pull out the gift you have been sitting on and use it, honey!
If your family thought you were awesome before, wait until they see you in this new light. Beaming with great joy and admiration, hear them declare, "that's my wife/mommy and she is WINNING!"
Until next time...because life doesn't get more "grand" than this...
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